Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Taming the Emotional Giant / Staying Up When Knocked Down

Good morning,

Have you ever noticed that it is a lot easier to magnify the negative comments that you hear about yourself than it is to remember the 1000 other positive comments that you have received from others? Have you ever caught yourself saying something less-than-positive about someone else and then, the next moment feeling the pain of an emotional jab in the gut? How about when the jab is from a close personal friend?

Ok, I've been struggling with the whole transparency thing here on this blog, wanting to talk positively about others more so than share what goes on in my head and potential vulnerabilities. I mean, really, doesn't everyone have something better to do?

It is that emotional giant that likes to peer it's nasty head and fire-breathing emotional ugliness our way that is on my mind this morning.

Coming from a family that emphasized over-achievement and seemed to have "forgotten" to say "I love you" with true sincerity (that was handled by throwing money at it), I have made daily efforts to strive to focus on the positive rather than the negative. Oh, yes, I am truly guilty of over-achievement, having my kids going without seeing me for sometimes, gulp, days, but they still tell me that I am the "best mommy in the whole world." Is that the view of a naive child that hopefully will not write a "Mommy Dearest" book later, or a true reflection of the results of efforts to remind them, every day, how much they are loved?

Well, lest I feed the emotional monster of guilt and negativity, even in this, my post, let me encourage you, today:

  1. Remember the positive. Soak it in. Relive it in your mind.
  2. Feeling a lack of the positive flow? Then create new positive flow. Look for someone who is sad. Give them a hug. Give them a smile. It is amazing how those good feelings multiply.
  3. Receive a negative comment, behavior, or look? Let it fall off you. Don't absorb it. If #1 doesn't help you deflect, than try #2.
  4. Remember your loved ones, those that love you most. Make sure when you close your eyes at night, you have given them positive vibes and love. Don't go to bed angry with them.
Life is short. You never know when you have traveled your last mile. Spread it with positive outflows and you will reap its benefits.

hugs to all,
-Deborah E
Jazz Singer
♫ Scat N Style ♫
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